Tuesday, 8 September 2009
He was brutal.
Looking at his gentle youthful face and slender body, one would never expect him to turn out to be such a sadist. Whenever I saw him before, he always smiled gently and said hello, ever so politely, and never appeared intimidating or threatening.
He mentioned to me when we first met, that if I decided I fancied it, I should just ask. That’s his job he said. I did not have to give him any advance warning, just check if he was free.
And today, I saw him doing nothing. He looked bored, and was polishing the equipment. I was not entirely alone: a couple of my friends were nearby. I decided it was probably OK to ask, and walked over to him.
-So?- I said- Come on then. Can we do it now?
-Yeah, sure! -he replied, and led me to the corner, picking up some mats and throwing them on the floor.
OK, I might have said that before, but it is worth repeating- to reinforce that image in your memory- before we go any further: I am a respectable married suburban woman.
First, he made me sit very close to him and interlock our legs together. Then, he gave me a ball to hold. And then, he told me to "go down". I looked up at him suspiciously, searching for any sign of harassment. Surely, he was winding me up? But he had a very straight face on. He was not smiling. He did not even blink.
Come on! Down!- he commanded, and I suddenly realized it was not such a good idea after all.
When I could not breathe any longer, he told me to change the position.
“Right”-he said to me and my friends, who were sitting next to us-“Watch, everybody. Now, you lie down this way, with your head underneath your partner…”- he ordered.
I obeyed, glancing at my friends to judge their reaction. We were supposed to go for a coffee after that session. I was not sure anyone would want to be seen out with me after this ever again.
“No”- he said- “Your head has to be right between my legs”
Eh? Surely, I thought, my husband will object to that?
I barely knew the guy. I did not even remember his name, to be honest, and he was not my type. That had never happened to me before. I looked around to ensure nobody else was watching. I chose to strain my neck and look ahead, where a large poster showed a gorgeous girl kicking her leg really high up in the air, her stomach muscles toned.
Right. Just breathe deeply and look forward, not up- I thought to myself -Focus on the girl, and breathe.
“Legs up!”- he ordered. I lifted my legs up, and he pushed them away roughly.
“Keep bringing them up!”- he shouted as I paused to catch my breath.
After that session, I could barely walk. My legs shook as I stumbled on and out, and into the car.
And all I wanted is to look like that girl on the poster. Maybe one day. I surely suffered enough abuse today.