Sunday, 25 April 2010

Kill the first one and hope the word gets around.

Not sure if you noticed (this is where I imagine you shouting "yes we did, we missed you lots!" ), but I have not blogged for some time. Not my fault. It is just that it has been unbelievably warm and sunny here. For the whole week we basked in glorious sunshine. On Thursday morning, around 7am, when I was getting in my car to drive to work, I noticed a thin layer of substance on the windscreen. Thought it was volcanic ash, but it turned out to be ice. Oh, I thought, that’s it. Back to normal, then.
But, by the afternoon, it was hot and sunny again.

And when it is this lovely outside, all I want to do is sit in the garden with friends, consume endless amounts of BBQ meat, and sip some chilled white wine. On Friday, I started early, with a few mums from school.... and smoothly continued into the evening, when some other local friends came for dinner. Clearly, was not in the best state for blogging.


We have been discussing this the other day.

In theory, should be shocking. But it isn’t. Not in the UK. So many shops here either sell, or have at some point attempted to sell, sexually suggestive clothing for children. I am talking lacy thongs and padded black bras for 9 year olds. Is it really that surprising that the teenage pregnancy rate in the UK is higher than anywhere else in Europe?

Encouraged by the over-sexed fashion, and -oh, don’t forget-free council housing, girls as young as 13 happily engage in sexual relationship.

I had my first boyfriend at school. We were 15 and thought of ourselves as cool and brave because we occasionally skived off lessons. We even went to the beach a few times. Shocking! We might have smoked a few cigarettes. No drugs. And no sex. I mean, absolutely no sex. In fact, my blue-eyed boyfriend never even kissed me. (even though, I was,of course, hoping) Our physical proximity was limited to slow dances at parties; also, in cinema, encouraged by the darkness, he would place his arm across the back of my seat.

OK, I might be getting more conservative with age. But this sexualisation of young girls in the UK concerns me. As a mother of a four year old, I thought I did not have to think about it for many, many years. But suddenly, I find myself noticing things that make me uncomfortable.

They are only four, but some of them dress like teenagers, showing up at parties wearing fishnet tights and bright pink lip gloss.

I know a few of my mummy friends would not see any problem with that. They would argue that it is just fashion, and there is absolutely no connection between painted nails at the age of four, and having sex at the age of thirteen.

But isn’t it all about growing up too early?

What are we going to do? I ask Husband. What are we going to do when she shows up one day with a boyfriend?

Husband said he would do what Bruce Willis suggested. Wait till the first one comes over, kill him and hope that the word gets around.


  1. That's right. My husband has his "berdanka" ready.

  2. What can you expect if the moms you know argue it's just fashion. If totally agree with you. It scares me how oversexualized images children face nowadays.
    My opinion is what children see and listen at home always prevails.
    If this doesn't work, just go for it and follow Bruce's advice.

  3. The Husband and Bruce Willis might be on to something, but the result might have to be awaited in jail ;)

    In the US we bought an old second-hand pickup truck that had a gun-rack in the back. I never even knew what it was or that it was there until later we heard from boys coming to the house that they took notice! (We did not own any kind of gun or riffle, just so you know!)

  4. And about the fashion for little girls -- I agree with you. The sad part it that it is the mothers themselves who buy these clothes for their daughters. As long as the girls are little the mothers have SOME say in what they wear.

    The culture and the stuff that the shops sell are a reflection of what people want. If these suggestive sexy little girls' clothes didn't sell, they'd disappear from the stores in a fast hurry.

  5. @ Miss Footloose: I like that story! It is like having the alarm box on the front of your house, never mind if it never worked...the robbers might think twice.
    What annoys me in some parents is this shrug shoulders what can I do? attitute. It starts from when those kids are babies...( "what can I do, he/she is only a baby...." ) and spirals till when it is too late; as you are by then, indeed, helpless: you get no respect, whatsoever.

  6. Blame Victoria's Secret. Walk thru any mall and you will find VS's clientele is not adult but young girls from 10-17. Parents, exert your authority and mandate that your little ones are dressed and treated like the precious little flowers they are. Sharon.

  7. Берданка is a single-shot rifle; Russian army adopted it back in 1870s. Its Azeri name, unless I am mistaken, is "dayan doldurum" :-)

  8. On the subject of early sexualization: this is of course the parents' worst nightmare, but I think many people tend to overreact. When you and your blue-eyed boyfriend were skipping school together, your mother must have been worried sick - and yet, you didn't have sex.

  9. @Riyad: Also, the degree of parents'worry must have something to do with the age of a boyfriend, too. Mine was my classmate. Some others can be a lot older..

  10. "What are we going to do when she shows up one day with a boyfriend?" What if one day she shows up with a girlfriend rather than the boyfriend you're expecting... will you shoot her too? :))))

  11. @Adrineh: Of course! I would not want anyone to think I discriminate? I am for equal rights, all around. :)

  12. I start building my weapons collection (swords, knofes, such things).
    the first thing that future boyfriend will be invited to see, when he will be so brave to come at my door, will be this one.