It has been four years since Madeleine McCann was snatched from her hotel bed in Portugal. Four years and I still get really upset thinking about it.
There is a huge number of horrible events happening in this world every minute. And, of course, it is not surprising that it simply is not physically possible for us to focus on every single one of them. I know that picking one little girl out of the sea of other missing, abused or murdered children is, probably, a little unfair.
You might argue that it was because the media made this particular story so personal, I reacted this way. Or maybe, it was the fact that it was a British middle-class family, just like ours, just like anyone I know around me, that brought it so close to home. But the truth is... nothing I saw in the news for an awfully long time affected me so deeply- for whatever reasons, logical or not.
I have to confess that, four years ago, when I first heard of the story, I cried an awful lot. It would always happen unexpectedly, like when I was driving to work. An image or a thought would just crush into my mind like a truck. I would see this 4-year old child peacefully sleeping in her PJ’s in bed when someone just walks in and takes her away, while her parents enjoy their relaxing dinner only yards away.
Obviously, I was not always this sensitive. In fact, I mentioned to you some time ago that I enjoy dark jokes. Some of the jokes I used to laugh at were pretty sick, and a few were about paedophiles. I thought they were hysterical. No need to say, it is somewhat different nowadays. Becoming a mother changed something in my head. At first, I blamed the hormones. I thought I would go back to normal self after a while. But now, 4 years on, as I still get just as disturbed and upset seeing that face in the news, I realize this sensitivity for certain topics is here to stay.
I was reading this popular book recently. Room. The author said it was triggered by the Fritzl case.
And I kept thinking that, despite my logic telling me that the chance of McCanns finding their daughter alive is very slim, I desperately wish that they do. I cannot even imagine what life must be like for that family, whether it has been 4 years or 40. So now, all of you who have faith in God. Come on then. Do some praying. I would if I could. Only I don’t see how any God who had allowed something like this to happen in the first place, would care enough to listen to you now. But hey, worth a try anyway, eh.