Why you should marry a poor man.

We had a family friend once, who sadly, had a very unpleasant disease and passed away a few years ago. When he died, everyone was terribly sad, including all his ex-wives. Yes, you heard me, all of them- plural. Now, if you ask how come they all attended the funeral and cried- not fake but real tears, every one of them would respond that he was a wonderful man. And I am sure that one of the reasons he was considered so wonderful was that he was, up to the end, very generous with them all. Every time he divorced yet another wife, he made sure she was well looked after. They were no quarrels over alimonies, no fights about apartments or university fees for the children. He took care of it all. Of course, it helped that the guy was quite rich. He was also generous which, coupled with the above, is a rare combination.

I have a theory these days, which I am about to share with you. I reckon there is a good chance that I am not far from reality with my theory, and if I had the opportunity to do a proper research, with, you know, a decent population sample and all, I would prove it correct. 

Basically, a lot of women secretly- or not so secretly- dream of marrying well. Marrying someone with a fabulous career or a lot of money. And that’s exactly why I think they are being very stupid. 

My theory is as follows. If you want to stay in a relationship forever, and you are wondering about your husband or a partner or a boyfriend leaving you one day for someone else, don’t go for rich.

It seems obvious, yet many women still try and hunt for a richer man. Stop!

Here are my reasons why it is a lot easier for a man with money to leave you.

1. When a man is rich, women start offering themselves, as we say back home, on the plate with a blue border. (Why blue? you ask. No idea. Maybe in older days, when this saying originated, pretty plates for special occasions had a blue border) So, imagine, lots of beautiful, young girls chase him every day. He goes to a shop to buy his next expensive suit and the sales assistant smiles at him with OMG, I would blow you right here right now stare. He looks in the mirror and thinks wow, all those amazing women want me, therefore I am a sex god. Of course, in reality, those women want his money not his dick, however men are delusional like that.

2. When they are rich, they think they should do better, because they can. Is like upgrading a car or a house. They can always get a new model.

3. They can afford to go. Because when they are rich, they don’t care about things other men worry about like who gets the savings or the house, or how much alimony you might demand. He can pay you shit lots, so you shut up and disappear quietly, and still afford to keep a new chick happy. The thing is, men, in their majority are, sadly, very practical in their approach to love and relationship. It all goes on those big imaginary scales. On one side is romance, on another- money. And in most cases, money wins. That’s why I talked here before about it being a good sign when men pay for dates and buy you gifts. When they do that- they invest in a relationship. The money they spent on long-term partner or a wife is sunk cost. It will never be recovered, but they still already spent it, and they don’t want to walk away from it. The more is invested, the harder it is to start again. Plus, don’t forget all the money he would have to give you afterwards. Unless…..the money he makes and has over-weights the pain of sunk cost of everything he had invested in you and he thinks oh, fuck it, she is a fat nagging bitch and I deserve much better. 

Well, this is all a bit shit, you say. So what do I do then???

Now, if you want my advice of how to ensure yours doesn’t run away from you, this is what I would recommend:

1.      Be rich. If parents were not rich, then try and make decent money yourself. It may be stating the obvious but being independent financially is a very good idea. Don’t make a mistake and listen to your partner who may suggest you should quit a good job to stay at home and look after the kids. You may regret this later when you find him checking himself out in that mirror and you know what he is thinking.

2.      Make good money and then marry someone poor. If he is poor, he won’t have the money for things like girlfriends, prostitutes or speedboats (which attract the girlfriends) .None of that. In fact, if you are a 2 or a 3, i.e. quite unattractive, maybe a little on the ugly side, marry someone jobless. Keep him at home, have a few kids and he will never go anywhere. Yours forever. He wont even have money for a pint after work, let alone a new woman.

3.     Most importantly, don’t ever forget that you are a girl. Ffs. Look after yourself. Look after your body, your face, your skin- as long as you can. Maybe buy fake boobs. It is an investment and a protection. Should you suddenly end up alone, as there is always a chance, you can still find someone else. Even at 80 as one of my friend’s mother.

So there you go. Don’t be jealous of other women who married rich men. Appreciate that with more money comes more freedom. Freedom of choice, freedom of thoughts, freedom of opportunities. And you wouldn’t like it if you knew just what some guys would do if only they could afford to.